Homeowner Tip # 537

I'm beginning to wonder when the learning curve levels off for being a Homeowner. At this rate, not anytime soon for me. My latest saga has been courtesy of the smoke detectors. Yes, I am as confused a you. I never think about those little buggers on the wall and I believe that's the way it's supposed to be...a home of peace and quiet unless there is an actual FIRE! In which case, I'd be more than delighted to hear blaring alarms at any hour of the night.
And FYI...I own a model home with interconnected alarms running through the house's AC wiring. So if one alarm is not happy, they are all not happy, which means I'm not happy, and consequently lil bro and Jonelly are also not happy. Ever since moving in, those cantankerous little buggers seem to go off at the slightest whiff of a barbecue a block away or the gentlest of breezes that floats in or any apparent excuse to keep me on my toes regarding fire safety. I have changed the batteries at least a few times since moving in and was greatly disturbed to be jolted from my Saturday night slumber by resounding chirps less than a week after switching the batteries again.
I sought my godly council on Sunday morning from Kim (also a neighborhood homeowner) and Jonathan, who Erin reported had resolved their chirping woes. Kim had not experienced middle of the night jolting and Jonathan said he had to replace all of his. Arghhh!
So after church, I was determined to get to the bottom of their chirping once and for all. I made it my mission to disable them. Having read the instruction booklet, I armed myself with a flat head and wedged those buggers off the wall. While on the phone to the service guy, they began to chirp again in unison!!!! Much to my chagrin, those buggers were not yet dead. Having retreated to the garage...yes, that's right! Run out of my own home by electronics... I returned to help Lance in removing each and every battery from their inners. And, low and behold, they chirped again!!! Lance assured me it was their dying breath but I was doubtful. Thankfully he was right.
Anyways I learned that my units dated 2003 should last 10 years...hmmmm....then what's the problem....service guy's best guess was wiring in the network was faulty and there was no way to easily figure out which one was the problem. HA! I finally know the problem and I can fix this...you buggers are done for. No more networking with each other to chirp in unison. I'll replace you with plain, battery alarms that resound for legitimate reasons only like a real FIRE!I even indulged in two special alarms with lights for the hallways. So....I believe the rockin refuge is back to normal. We're armed, We're ready, and We're finally back to sleeping in peace. I'm hoping to, once again, forget all about my smoke detectors in the very near future.